Are you content or are you just coping with bad dynamics?

This week we have been talking about Growth.

I have been using the ego as a prime example of why people get stuck in self destructive toxic behaviors. I have a lot of comments about what it takes to move away from this type of behavior and move towards healthy growth. So, come and play along.

Are you confused about being content? What does your contentment look like? If you think you are content, then you have to ask the why. If you think you are content but you are really not,

Here is my commentary:

RED FLAGS

• Fear – What you think is contentment, is actually fear – What does this look like? A grandiose example of this is when you know something is wrong in your heart, but you keep doing it anyway. Maybe you keep doing it because you are fearful of what might happen if you stop. Maybe you keep up with the behavior because the shame of it is so hurtful, you can’t see a path around it. Maybe you think that if you stay the course and keep re-enforcing the wrong, it will validate you and eventually the hurt will go away.
• Avoidance – Ignorance and Mislabeling of the problem – Bad fruit is raining down on you and instead of looking at yourself, you blame others – Isn’t it easy to blame others? You create an “Us vrs Them” scenario and instead of trying to create good boundaries and repair innerself, you take your position and try to spread it as “Good News” to others. Some people even jump on board and agree with you. Because afterall, when you only look at one side, you have to be right, right?
• Self Neglect – You know your behavior is incorrect. You know how you feel is not right. You know your relationship is unhealthy. Yet you choose to stay in it anyway. You choose to stay in an unhealthy relationship, you choose to allow yourself to be mistreated. You allow your choices to impact others and you have consequences from those choices.

  SEEDS OF GROWTH 

• Faith – Is your Faith in Jesus or is it dependence on another? What does your Faith look like? Are you ignoring God’s voice that you know is truth, in order to get what you want? Are you relying on Him or are you relying on others? Better yet, are you relying on yourself? Belief is an action. You must live the belief in order for it to be a true belief. Faith is how we live out our beliefs. 
• Growth – Growing means you have surrendered and are making changes to improve. Growing is Faith and Beliefs put into action. Growing is hard work and is uncomfortable at first. Growing has peaks and valleys. The more you grow the more it looks like peace and true contentment. 
• Humility – Confidence without arrogance but must include healthy boundaries  . This is a difficult area. If you think you are humble you might want to look again. What does humility look like?
  • An accurate view of who you truly are. 
  • Accountability for your own actions.
  • Openness to teachability.
  • Willingness to serve.
  • Receptiveness to correction.

True contentment is linked to God’s presence. Jesus is the provider of content. 

Philippians 4:11-13 NIV

11 I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. 12 I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. 13 I can do all this through him who gives me strength.